Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Turning 39

Hey there lady...It no more excuses for you, you ain't so young git going.

 It is my birthday today and I am 39. I'm not happy about it. I always thought that turning 40 would be hard but talking to a folks, 39 is gonna be a hell of a year. And not the fun side of hell either.

I think we put so much pressure on what it means to be 40. And the fact at 40 we should have all of our shit together and know who we are, where we should be and know what want out of life. We should be successful adults. We should be strong in mind and body.

Well, if you are getting closer to 40 and you don't know these things yet , you better get there fast.  This is where my 39th year comes in. It is time to play catch-up.

Let me be honest here...I do have a pretty wonderful life. I am happily married to a wonderful guy, who loves me and makes me laugh, and keeps me calm when I have my depressive moods. I have lots and lots of friends who I can talk to about anything. I have a wonderful family that understands me(mostly). And I have this crazy idea that I can do this art thing.

That's were thing get a little bit screwy, the art thing. I've always been a late bloomer and finding myself as a super motivated and self sufficient person has kind of eluded me a bit. Well... no more excuses or feeling bad for myself is allowed. I must figure out all of this NOW, because time is running out. I've got 365 days to understand where I am going in this life of mine. And I need to figure out how to get there. And Go...and be there with myself.

So stick with me all and let's watch this transformation happen.

What has been your worst birthday year?


Lindsey said...

though I'm a bit younger, I have the same feeling about turning 30 in two years. At this point I've realized I need to live my life and not worry too much about where it's going.

I wish you luck in self exploration and Happy Birthday :)

bluehour said...

Thanks...Now that I've had one full day of being 39, I have matured and will heed your advice. :)

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